AVReading Newsletter December: Faster Alone; Farther Together

 

I am sometimes profoundly moved by the wisdom of my students.  I recall one student who once told me she was taught growing up that, “We can run faster alone, but we can run farther together.”  With that simple exchange, my thinking around community and collaboration totally changed.  

            Under the idea of constructivism, this all makes sense.  Students can try to learn the concepts and skills we give them on their own.  A teacher can assign readings and papers and projects, and expect students to process these lessons and learn in their own little silos of thinking, and they can move pretty quickly. They do not have to wait up for slower moving, less motivated or distracted peers.  They just get the work and move on to the next lesson. 

            Yet, there are so many limitations to this way of learning.  For starters, collaborative learning spaces have built in support groups.  If an individual gets stuck, there are others available to help problem solve.  Additionally, things that might normally take an individual a long time can be done much more quickly as a group.  It’s the “many hands make light work” theory.  Finally, the product of a group has the possibility of being richer than the product of the individual.  Groups that work well are those where the members can freely offer constructive feedback to one another, an advantage that is even greater when there is diversity within the thinking of the members. 

            Here are a few class community activities that I have found especially meaningful.

            Jigsaws.  Jigsaws are a great way to cover a lot of territory in a short time.  I like to use this activity when I assign longer articles.  I break students into about five groups.  Each group is assigned a different segment of the article and must read and document specific parts of the text:  a general summary, important details, and significance of each section.  Each student in the group must record each of those pieces. Then, I re-arrange the groups so that there is a representative from each of the original groups in each of the new groups.  Once in the new groups, each individual must share out the summary, important details and significance of their section. 

            Open Space Technology.  I’ve written about this activity in the past, but it is such a fantastically, engaging way to crowd source information.  The gist of the assignment is that the class will research a given topic.  Then, within a shared document, they will complete a data dump after a given amount of time.  Finally, the students review the data and share out one piece of evidence they find particularly interesting or useful.  I like to do Open Space activities at the onset of a unit.  And I am often able to pull articles and videos from their data dump later in the unit. 

Google Slides.  I really like using this tool for crowd sourcing a lesson.  For example, in my Narratives and Video Gaming class, I used to set up a Google Slide Show and created a slide for each group in the class.  For that slide, they would have to review an independently produced video game.  In the Google Slide show, each group needs to populate various regions: title of the independent video game, image, summary of the game’s story, bulleted list of the “game play” and a bulleted general review of the game.  Eventually, we project the slide show and each group shares out their findings.  This same activity can be repeated with large pieces of paper or big white boards, which I will do from time to time just to mix it up.  However, at least once a term, I like to make use of the Google Slides.  I find that the quality of their work is a little bit better than with the other mediums. Regardless, students  are constructing knowledge collectively. 

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AVReading Newsletter November: Engagement versus Submission

As a young teacher, I remember visiting the classrooms of my mentors and being awed by their ability to lead the group rather effortlessly through a learning experience.  On a superficial level, I was impressed by the attentiveness and orderliness of the group.  Students did not talk out of turn, they had their materials ready, they had thoughtful things to say. It felt just like a scene from Dead Poets Society or even Harry Potter where nearly all of the classroom scenes reflected a very eager or (at the very least) a very compliant collection of students. 

            Unfortunately, my observations were entirely misguided.  For starters, my data set was limited to fictional classrooms or-- in the event of my mentors-- Honors and AP classes where the level of participation  is different from the average on-level or intervention class, which I was much more likely to teach.  Furthermore, I misinterpreted how the students were working.  On the surface, it seemed to be about control and submission.  In other words, it looked from my perspective as though the teacher had exerted control over the class and they willingly submitted.  Therefore, I felt that to be a good teacher I too would need to exert control and demand a type of submission. 

But a more nuanced understanding of those model classrooms suggests that I was seeing engagement and buy-in not submission.  In the chapters to come, we will unpack this idea of engagement a little bit more deeply, but at this point, I would like to specifically address the idea of engaging students as a collective group.

In many of my struggles with classes, my first reaction is to complain about the superficial behaviors: they talk out of turn, they are getting out of their seats, they are not listening, they are not using their work time, they are not completing tasks.  Defining the problem in this way puts all of the responsibility on the students.  It suggests that all of this would be better if they simply behave more maturely.  But when interpreted from another lens, these behaviors could be seen as an indicator of disengagement, meaning that students do not feel connected to their teacher, their fellow classmates, or the content of the course. So then, the question changes from “why won’t they listen / respect / respond to me?”  and becomes “How can I get them better engaged or invested as a community?”  

Here are a few thoughts about how to encourage collective engagement.

Find joy.  Creating an atmosphere of community begins with the joyfulness and playfulness of the teacher.  As often as possible, I begin class with something fun.  They are just bits of silliness to engage students.  “Turn and say ‘Hello’ to the person sitting next to you, and tell them about the weirdest (legal) thing in your backpack right now.”  “Turn and talk to your neighbor, explain to them why they might enjoy a one way trip to Mars!”  “Okay, today, I have a deep philosophical question I want you to ponder.  Why is it you can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish?”  The best openers are those where you can call on students and engage them a little.  “Right now, point to the best singer in the room.”  When TikToks were big, we discussed the hottest trends.  When the spinners were popular, we had “spinner tricks” where students stood up and displayed their skills.  Just have fun with them.  

Listen.  Having meaningful conversations with students in those moments just before class starts, or even just moments before they leave, are extremely valuable.  They are also extremely difficult since there is usually a lot going on and since I am usually exhausted by everything that an average day in front of students can bring.  But, in these candid moments of conversations, I discover so much about the music, shows, apps, games, hobbies, and trends that interest students by just being willing to engage them in conversation.  

Warm Demander.  Getting a “community” feel within a classroom is not about discipline and respect. However, it does not mean that the classroom is a free-for-all where “anything goes”.  Ed Moore in his book Guide for White Women Who Teach Black Boys, he describes the happy medium between tough love and unhealthy permissiveness.  He calls teachers who hit this balance “warm demanders”.  It is the ability to have expectations, to voice those expectations, and model those expectations without having to create an atmosphere of law and order, where the message becomes “do it my way, or you are going to have to leave”.  Warm demanders are capable of setting standards within a classroom but know who to be flexible when classes struggle.  They know how to address individual behaviors versus punishing entire classes. They work relentlessly to build and foster relationships, and let students know that even after times of frustration and disagreement they will always be welcomed back.  This is important to establishing the feel of community within a classroom. Everyone is welcome! And that means absolutely everyone!  When I signed up for this life, I did so knowing that I would have to teach everyone, not just the ones I found pleasant and agreeable and submissive.  What can I do today to make my students feel connected, not simply compliant?

Moore, Eddie. The Guide for White Women Who Teach Black Boys. Corwin, 2018.

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AVReading Newsletter October: Obstacles to Community

 

As a society, collaboration and community does not come very easily for us.  So much of our cultural narrative is built upon the idea that people just have to tough it out on their own.  If you want to make it in this world, you have got to take matters into your own hands and power through.  You can’t depend on others, and anyone who does not do their share is simply a freeloader.  Additionally, we are not very trusting.  We are more likely to be suspicious of our peers than we are to engage them in conversation, or get to know them.  In fact in the classroom, “creating community” which too often is lumped in with “collaboration” is more often than not dreaded by students.  Inevitably, students complain about the ugly side of group work where one or two participants end up doing a disproportionate amount of the work. 

            Students also come to class with histories that might get in the way. They come to class with perhaps bad experiences with other class members, making them less interested in making themselves more vulnerable or willing to work in groups.  Or maybe they have history with other teachers, who had poorly planned attempts to create community which only ended in humiliation or frustration.  

            Even as a teacher, I have struggled with creating community.  Growing up, I was one of those students who just wanted to get my work done without everyone getting all up in my business.  And whenever I design activities where students do have to work together, I have this sinking fear that they won’t do it. 

With that said, I am often surprised by these magical moments when those groups really do come together.  Not too long ago, I had an activity where students were randomly assigned a partner with whom they would read an article.  After describing the process and assigning partners, there was this moment when I remember thinking, “Oh, I don’t know if this is going to work.”  But eventually, students moved to their respective spaces, and for the next 25 minutes they would sit across from each other reading and interacting with the text and one another.  It was one of those beautiful moments where they simply bought into the activity and went with it.

I use this as an example to show that generally our fears as teachers keep us from trying these community building activities.  And I will not lie, there have been times when my activities were weak or student involvement was quite minimal.  It isn’t entirely unusual that at least one individual will simply “opt out” of the activity, no matter how much I encourage them to join the group.  And that’s okay.  The resistance of a few should not deter us from prioritizing community building activities.  Pushing our students to make connections with others and to finding ways to solve problems together helps them to use muscles and skills that many of them never knew they had.  

            Here are a few things I’ve learned about building community.

            Have a seating chart.  I know this seems like a weird tip for “building community” but I found that when I do not have a seating chart, students seem to settle into their social cliques more.  Forcing them to interact with people they might not normally interact with, I hope, forces them into some new circles.  

            Tone.  Establishing tone is a bit more abstract, but throughout my career, I have had to make some adjustments to improve my sense of community, and one of them was to check my humor and sarcasm.  While I still enjoy being playful throughout my lessons, I am so much more careful of the little jokes and asides that I make.  Beyond that, I have worked really hard to virtually eliminate all expressions of sarcasm.  It has made a noticeable difference.  When I do tease or use sarcasm, it creates an atmosphere for others to do so as well, which inhibits or frustrates community building.  And whatever benefits one might gain by making the class laugh are greatly outweighed by the damage of laughing at someone’s expense. 

            Notebook Trick.  This is such a petty trick that I almost hesitate to include it.  However, I subscribe to using as many tools as possible, and in some cases the notebook trick inspires a little more effort.  During group time, as students are working on things, I’ll just circulate throughout the room with my small notebook, periodically writing some things down.  In honesty, I am making lists for what I need to do during my prep or some writing ideas that I have had, but students generally assume that I am taking notes on them.  On the rare occasion where a student actually asks what I am writing down, I tell them, but I suspect that most believe that they are being assessed on their small group skills or general engagement. 

 

 

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AVReading Newsletter September: The Importance of Community

 

On occasion, I have had one of those classes where there is just one personality in the room who seems to bring the group together.  It is a rare and beautiful phenomenon to behold.  For those students who are especially good at it, they can somehow create a mood or atmosphere within the room just by being a willing and interested participant in the activities and then by some wonderful sense of energy can bring along most of the class with them.  

            Those students are exceptional and they truly do make the learning experience seem much more effortless.  Aside from the personality of that individual, the truly significant factor is the willingness of the group to buy-in to the class or to participate and engage.  A particularly skilled teacher can also have this effect.  

            The truth is that creating a sense of community within a class is pretty difficult.  There are so many different variables, many of which are beyond our control.  Sometimes, it is a matter of personality combinations within a classroom. Sometimes it’s the time of day, or even the design or layout of the actual space.  

            Nevertheless, creating community is pretty foundational to learning-- especially for those who have not had a lot of academic success in the past.  It’s part of the social aspect of learning.  In fact, one of the downfalls of the factory model of education is that it  treats the student as an individual component being processed through the system that largely treats everyone the same.  But educational research, specifically within the field of social constructivism, offers a much different model of learning.  Essentially, social constructivism promotes the idea that first, people learn best when they do so within communities, and second, that people learn better when they have the opportunity to construct their knowledge (as opposed to being simply given knowledge).  Social constructivism is about engaging the learner-- with other people and with the process of learning.  

            Still, creating community takes time.  It includes many different approaches, using a lot of different tools.  Here are a few to begin a school year or class.

            Artifacts:  As students enter your classroom, what do they see?  In what ways have you designed your space to let everyone know that they are welcome.  There are lots of commercially produced posters and visuals that are fine, but perhaps more meaningful are the artifacts left behind by past students. These are the carefully chosen pieces of artwork and projects that can be displayed on your walls that communicate an openness to the richness and diversity of our world, with special attention to racial, linguistic, physical, cultural and gendered messages.  A safe zone sticker on your door can speak volumes, as can the poetry of Tupac or the words of James Baldwin, or the written profile of Bayard Rustin  

            Physical Set-Up: The actual design of your room’s floor plan with the placement of desks is also an important consideration.  The more we can move out of rows and columns, into clusters or groups (or even big circles) the better. 

            Day One: Creating community needs to be prioritized from day one!  Too often, we jump right into the syllabus or (worse yet) the rules and expectations of a class.  It just sends the wrong message. It seems to say, “who you are” is less important than “how you should act or behave”.  Have fun with it.  For example, I have the privilege of node desks in my room. They are the desks on wheels that allow for lots of flexibility and movement of a classroom design.  So we spend about ten minutes competing in “Chair Olympics.”  For this,  I post a layout design on the board, and they are then given 30 seconds to re-configure the room into that design.  It’s a lot of fun and kind of silly, but it also gets them moving.  My last design is a big circle where we then do some sort of snap around!  No matter what, make the day about creating connections. 

 

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AVReading Newsletter June: Rumination

 

It is important to recognize that there is a difference between being a reflective practitioner and someone who becomes overwhelmed by their thoughts, fears, and anxieties.  While there is a time when we need to let ourselves “be in our feelings” and to experience those emotions of pain and fear, productive reflection requires that we also bring a little more structure and intentionality to our thinking and meditations.  

The psychological term for excessive contemplation of oneself is called rumination.  It is the mental process whereby someone ponders a past or future event until their emotional response has grown disproportionately to the impact of the original thought. Some people refer to it as a mental “rabbit hole.”  Rumination is not abnormal, especially for teachers.  Consider the many times you have driven home as you mentally replayed an event from the day.  You likely spent a good amount of time revisiting the moment in your head, justifying your choices, and (my personal favorite) re-creating much more snarky or witty dialogue that you had wished you had said at the time.  

These scenarios are not unusual.  They are the result of the nature of our work, where we are constantly bumping heads with other people, challenging them to do more or do better.  Sometimes the things others say hurt us, and sometimes the things we say hurt them.  So processing these events are simply natural reactions to emotionally charged events.  However, they become a problem when we allow those ruminations to go unchecked, when we continue on with those resentments or hurt feelings until we have blown things out of proportion and painted ourselves out to be the innocent victims who share little responsibility in the outcomes.  Even in cases where we have been wrongfully accused or hurt, it is important that we build in some type of mental speed bump, where we can slow down for just a moment, re-adjust, and continue on with our regularly scheduled lives, so that our loved ones do not need to bare the brunt of our struggles and sorrows each day.

Here are some tips to building some of those mental speed bumps.

Write. For me, writing allows me the opportunity to put it out there, bring form to my hurts and sorrows, and to leave it behind (even if for a short while).  But I know this is not for everyone.  

Exercise.  There is nothing like a strenuous workout to reboot the brain and allow you to work out some of that negative energy.  Low impact options like yoga are also good for clearing your head, and giving your heart a chance to resettle a little.  But perhaps the easiest and healthiest is simply a nice twenty minute walk outdoors.  From Henry David Thoreau to Mahatma Gandhi, some of our world’s greatest thinkers worked their thoughts out by going for a nice, quiet stroll.  

Confide in a Mentor.  Being a good teacher is a demanding task.  It should not be undertaken on your own.  Find someone who is willing to meet with you briefly on a weekly basis and who might be available for both regularly scheduled visits and the occasional early evening phone calls when you just need to process things or vent.  

Laugh.  Okay, not the forced kind of laugh that can feel more like an angry burst.  But a good, heartfelt chortle.  It can start with a willingness to laugh at ourselves.  Doing so allows us to avoid taking ourselves too seriously, and if for even a moment, giving us a reprieve from the weight of the world.  Losing ourselves in an episode of our favorite comedy, playing on the floor with the family pet, or chasing children around the house until they squeal with laughter allows us all to come back to the beauty of this moment now.

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AVReading May: What We Do Not Know

 

I am often caught off guard by what I do not know.  For as much as I try to humbly enter each day with the understanding that I am still learning, there is that part of me that just assumes I already know what there is to know about the world around me.  And yet, I regularly learn that I simply do not have a clue -- in some cases it probably is a willful cluelessness.

            About a year ago, I was in a meeting with a group of educators when I used the phrase, “Well, let’s just  call a spade a spade and tell them what we truly think.”  It was a phrase I had grown up with and had read and used through the years.  And as soon as I said it, my colleague who is a person of color called me out on it.  “Actually, Scott.  You need to check that phrase.  It has a pretty oppressive history.”  It was a humbling moment.  It took me by absolute surprise, but after reading a little about the phrase’s history, I understood how it was hurtful (Gandhi 2013).

            It is a reminder that I still have so much to learn.  I am an incomplete work of art.  This does not absolve me of the responsibility I have for growing my understanding of the world and how it works, but it should give me a little bit of breathing room to make mistakes, own them, and dedicate myself to becoming a better version of myself.  

            The solution to knowing what I do not know is a bit of a paradox.  Knowing “I do not know” assumes that I understand my limitations, but it also implies that I can do more to learn about the people and world around me.  

            But what does that look like?  Where can we possibly begin, especially when we are talking about issues related to race and culture. Here are some tips to challenging what you know and becoming more open about what you do not know

            Cross Borders.  In today’s environment, this phrase has taken on a much more charged connotation.  Within the world of social sciences, “crossing borders” refers to the movement across cultural, racial, social, or gendered groups.  Crossing borders is not always easy.  But it is a dedication to finding spaces, eateries, coffee shops, places of worship, parks, schools, neighborhoods, movie theatres, and community centers where you can meet and engage with a diverse collection of people. 

            Read.  The responsibility for checking our privilege should not rest solely on the shoulders of those who have been most impacted.  Here is where it is best to do what you can to commit yourself to reading widely.  Roxanne Gay, Robin Di’Angelo, Ibram X. Kendl, David Treuer, Bryan Stevenson, bell hooks, Zaretta Hammond, Chanel Miller and Jose Antonio Vargas  to name just a few can help you to become a little more aware of  what we likely do not know.  

Podcasting.  Although this is not my medium of choice, podcasting has become a rich source on issues of social justice.  Code Switch, the Ezra Klein Show, and Pod Save the People are a good place to start.  While they do not quite have the same depth as books, they do come with other advantages.  They have the power to respond more immediately to cultural trends and events, they are shorter, and in some cases they are much more lively.

Be Open.  Knowing what you do not know is a way of life.  It is a willingness to take on difficult areas of study, to acknowledge ideas that conflict with your own, to stand in spaces you might not normally inhabit, to listen and watch without comment, and to commit yourself to become an anti-racist. 

 

Gandhi, Lakshmi. “Is It Racist To 'Call A Spade A Spade'?” NPR, NPR, 23 Sept. 2013, www.npr.org/sections/codeswitch/2013/09/19/224183763/is-it-racist-to-call-a-spade-a-spade.

 

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AVReading Newsletter March: Honesty

 

As part of our  yearlong study on being reflective practitioners, our emphasis this month is on honesty.  A regular downside to self reflection is that we tend to be less than honest with our assessments.  It is just really hard to acknowledge some truths or realities that might exist in our worlds because they can totally shake the foundations of what we might believe or think.  

            This is especially true when we begin to consider constructs like race and how schools have maintained systems of power that disproportionately target students of color.  Being honest, in this sense, means that white teachers (like myself) have to perpetually acknowledge the way our whiteness has not only benefited us, but the way it has influenced the way we see race.  And the same can be said for our understanding of class, gender, and ableness as well.  It is not as though we had set out to create these biases and prejudices.  They have happened over the course of our lifetimes, starting from our earliest days of development.  Our views of the world have been largely shaped by the way we have been socialized into our current beliefs and perceptions.  

            Since we have internalized these beliefs and understandings of the world through a lifetime of experiences, it is understandable that even though our intentions may be good and our aspirations are to be anti-racist, we are likely to perpetuate white supremacy.  It’s a difficult first step to take: acknowledging our complicity in a system that continually works to dehumanize and reduce people.  Yet Native American Historian Jack Forbes once stated that while people today do not need to feel responsible for the offenses of their ancestors, they do need to feel responsible for what happens today, which is the product of the past (Ortiz 2015).  

            It is a difficult first step.  Yet like so many difficult steps, it is an important one.  It is a step that requires absolute honesty in looking at our own lives and acknowledges that for as much as we would like to believe that our positions are exclusively the result of our own hard work and merit, they have been assisted by a system of privileges.   Unpacking this takes vigilance.  A lifetime of socialized practices and assumptions is not reversed in a day, a month or a year.  It takes a lifetime of honesty and fearless examination.  

            Here are some prompts for reflection or writing around the idea of honesty.

Where is the Pain and Suffering? We live in a world of great inequity.  For some of us, we have the privilege of escaping the realities of those extreme inequities.  We can either separate ourselves physically from the suffering or we find other ways to simply distract ourselves.  Yet, this does not mean that the pain and suffering is nonexistent.  Who in my family, class, community is in pain?  

How Have I Been Silent?  In light of that pain and suffering, how have I contributed to that pain and suffering in remaining silent?  In what ways have I remained silent in the face of hurtful things other people have said?  Have I challenged long held assumptions and biases of others?  

Whose Voice Have I Silenced? Sometimes the spaces we create in our classrooms are not spaces where everyone feels comfortable sharing of themselves or their experiences.  Sometimes we joke or tease with students in ways that might demean or minimize others.  Sometimes we shut down or minimize the voices of students who are not part of the non-dominant culture.  Sometimes we do not intervene when we should, we let racially or sexually charged assumptions go unchecked, and the result is that we silence the voices of students who might have otherwise engaged in our classrooms.  What are choices I make throughout my day that might silence students?

 

Dunbar-Ortiz, Roxanne. An Indigenous Peoples' History of the United States. Beacon Press, 2015.

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Literacy Strategies 2023

 Here is the presentation where you can find our four "take away" activities:  Paired Readings, Effect / Cause Graphic Organizer, Claim / Evidence Inference, and Word Play.

AVReading Newsletter February: Forgiveness

 

I make so many mistakes throughout the course of any given day that I often wonder if I am doing more harm than good.  

            Each morning as I walk to school, I ask to be an instrument of love, mercy, and compassion, not an instrument of pain and hurt.    I am continually working to forgive and in some cases “ask for forgiveness.”  A while back, I took the rather rare step of removing one young man from my 5th hour class for the day.  My finesse skills are usually much better, and I like to employ other tools than removal.  But on this particular day, I told the young man, “You need to leave.”  He clearly was not pleased, but I insisted that he must go and that we would talk about this later.  The incident sat in my head for the rest of the day and even as I fell asleep that night.  The next morning, I was walking the halls on another task, and I bumped into the young man.  As soon as he saw me, you could see the look of dread in his eyes.  But before he could say anything, I said, “Hey, I’m actually here to see a different student, but I am glad that you are here.  I’ve been thinking a lot about yesterday and how things happened.  And I want to tell you that I am sorry.  I was impatient, and I acted too quickly.  I can be better.”  The student paused for a moment.  Looked up at me and said, “And I know that I should have been more willing to listen to you.”  He held out his hand for a shake, and said, “I’m sorry too.”  

            As much as I like to believe in the tools of science to help educators make good decisions in the classroom, I also know that we are imperfect beings making thousands of decisions each day, most of which are good but some of which are bad.  Our journeys as reflective practitioners will require some study of grace and how it should play out in our lives as teachers.

            Here are some important considerations on forgiveness.

            Who Have I Hurt?  Sometimes this is easy to answer. We can readily identify those moments when you can just see the pain we have caused flash through the look on a student’s face.  Sometimes, this isn’t an easy answer we might feel justified in our responses—even if they do cause pain in others.  And sometimes, it difficult simply because we are too proud to admit that we were wrong or simply unwilling to put up with the childish or rude behavior of others.    

            What am I Carrying?  In some cases, we carry the guilt and shame of our mistakes long after others have let it go.  Once we have taken responsibility for our errors and have made amends where possible, we need to forgive ourselves and move on. Carrying that emotional pain eventually becomes a matter of harmful pride.  

            How Do I Make Amends?  Not every misstep will require a formal conversation.  Again, the sheer multitude of mistakes we make on any given day would mean one big constant “I’m sorry,” and that really does not do anyone much good.  I generally know when I need to make amends to someone based on the magnitude of the event and the persistence of that event on my conscience.  It gets more complicated when we are on the second or third apology to an offended party.  But even in those cases, the return to dialogue with students shows a willingness on both parts to invest in the relationship and make things better. 

 

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AVReading Newletter January: Looking Back on Reflections

 

Beyond just the value of writing ourselves into understanding, written reflection can also serve as important information for our future selves.   Remember, we tend to recall the things we like and bury the things we don’t.  So a written record of our lives in the classroom keeps us more honest about our shortcomings and mistakes. I recall a reflection I had written at the end of one year that stated, “Your failure rates were much higher this year.  I think that you could have been more proactive and consistent with your calls home.  Those have historically been an effective tool in addressing students who are not handing in work.”  In this case, I am much less likely to make that mistake again.  Additionally, had I not returned to that reminder six months later, I’m not sure I would have caught it.   

Sometimes it is painful to re-read those past reflections.  Honestly, re-living some of those memories can be traumatic.  Or, we re-read them and wince because from a distance we can see our flaws and mistakes much more clearly.  In fact, this psychological tendency has been studied quite thoroughly.  In a 2017 study, Seto and Schlegel concluded that people tend to think of their present selves as a more authentic representation of who they really are than their past selves.  And people are fairly certain that their future selves will be even closer to their “true selves.”  Knowing this helps to explain why reading our past reflections can sometimes be painful.  It’s also a good warning because for as much as we would like to believe that our current manifestation is significantly better than our past manifestation, there is a good chance (as indicated in the writings) that we are simply making the same mistakes.  

Here are some helpful mental frames to use when looking back on past reflections:

Evaluate the Original Reflection.  With the distance of time, sometimes we notice things that we perhaps didn’t fully realize in the moment.  I remember finishing my trimester in the fall of 2016.  It was a really difficult time.  My classes were a little more unsettled than usual.  Student “buy-in” was lower than normal.  And it felt like the relationship building process took much longer than normal.  At the time, my reflections tended to focus on a few outspoken individuals and my inability to engage them.  By the end of December however, my classes were totally different, much more willing to engage, participate, and work.  At the time, I attributed the breakdowns to things I was doing and specific personality combinations.  Six months later, I really began to wonder if the cause (at least in part) was related to an uncertainty and anxiety by the entire community over the ongoing drama of the Presidential Elections.  My original assessment became more unclear with the passage of time. 

Don’t Skip Over the Tough Stuff.  As you read back on your experiences, don’t shy away from those passages where you acknowledge mistakes.  There is no reason to wallow in self-pity and regret, but there is good reason to acknowledge missteps and commit to avoiding them in the future. 

Isolate Two or Three Changes.  In working with my speech and debate students, I insist that they record parts of their speeches and then review those recordings.  However, as they do this, I always remind them that the objective isn’t to complete some holistic approach of “fixing” everything.  Instead, I ask them to identify two or three behaviors / features / elements beforehand.  This narrows their focus and allows them to see growth in small steps, as opposed to approaching their work with the idea that either “everything is broken” or “nothing is broken.’  It’s important to approach our reflections the same way.  In reading them, the goal is to isolate just a few discrete changes versus trying to completely scrap everything and start anew.  

Seto, Elizabeth, and Rebecca J. Schlegel. “Becoming Your True Self: Perceptions of Authenticity across the Lifespan.” Self and Identity, vol. 17, no. 3, 2017, pp. 310–326., doi:10.1080/15298868.2017.1322530.

 

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